In Which I Write a Letter

Dear Grad School,

You selfishly take all my energy, money, time, and words. It would be quite nice of to give me something in return as opposed to more papers to write and more bills to pay. In fact, if you could give me back some semblance of a social life and get me a job, I would be more inclined to appreciate you in this moment. Right now you have tied my hands behind my back and have created in me such a strong feeling of procrastination that I find myself writing songs about marrying rich, or finding a job, or have a house with a mouse that would eat all my papers. I would do almost anything to avoid writing another paper but our house is already clean and my clothes are already put away and my bike has a flat tire. I am forced into a corner where you are the only means of escaping.

Grad School, people tell me that the payoff for fraternizing with you will be great in the end. However, I wish we could fast forward a year and a half so I would have my diploma, you would have your money, and I might have a job doing something I fiercely enjoy. Then perhaps we could have a much more amicable relationship. I am not mad at you, per se, I am just not fond of you as I am writing my third paper in as many days.

My dear friend and nemesis, Grad School, lets be better friends today. We could do things like swing on swings late at night, go on picture taking adventures, take a long nap, or simply watch a good episode of OTH. Instead, these are the things you keep me from doing. But alas, there is a part of me that does appreciate you. Please don't hold this tiff against me for I am hopeful I will get over it soon.

Some of my love, most of my money, and all of my current frustration,

Jess

In Which I Say Random Things

There is going to be a stream on conscience, so I cannot guarantee that I have much of worth to say at all but I will probably just ramble.

The weather has been so nice lately that it has resulted in lots of walks and bike rides. Both of which I enjoy. Oh, and reading outside. I like books. A lot. There has also been lots of picture taking because things are coming alive once again. But, that also means there have been tons of rabbits on the trail. I guess they come alive in spring too... and procreate... and run all over the trails like I am about to maul them over with my bike. Which I don't do. In fact the other morning we went on a sunrise ride. I am still not sure what I was thinking when I willingly volunteered to get up at 5:50 and ride a bike for a few hours. I must have been on something. It was worth it though.

Tonight I sat on a cliff at a park I had never been too and talked about how simple life seemed there. There weren't people around but there was music. Well nature's music. There was the sound of leaves being slightly rustled by the wind, water swiftly flowing over the rocks far below us, and the occasional call of a wayward bird. It was beautiful music without the distractions of ringing phones and speeding cars. There, on that cliffside, life seemed so idealistic and simple. If we had stayed there for hours, I would have been content; watching the day turn to night, taking photographs to freeze moments in time, and simply being. Life is very rarely as simple and filled with contentment as those moments were. Sadly though, reality can only be put on hold for so long.

Last night I found a blog post the kid wrote while visiting me last month. I had forgotten all about it until I had the desire to get inside her head. (She is far too wise for her own good sometimes). Unfortunately, I had recently cleared the history on my computer so I had to trace it through Tennessee. It was well worth it. Though long, it talked about beauty and the way she explained it is astonishing. She traced it back to the garden and how God spoke everything into being yet he formed us with his own two hands... definitely a difference in the two things. Later, sitting around our kitchen table, which we rarely use, I read it to my roommate and it sparked a great conversation. The kid may not like me for this, but here it the link to the original post. It is beautiful.

Okay, I think I am done rambling about nothing important at all. Off to shower or work on school or put away clothes or just exist.

Peace.

In Which I Procrastinate

Things I should be doing:

- I should be writing a paper or three.

- I should be unpacking my bag and my laundry basket and my backpack from when I got back. A week ago.

- I should be making or eating breakfast, other than chocolate, since I have been up for four hours.

- I should be vacuuming (such a weird word) our living room since I just crunched some cereal, among other things, into the carpet.

Sure, things I should be doing but am not currently doing.

On church last night:

- Last night, the rooms and I were going to go to church, we really were up until about one minute before we were supposed to leave. Somewhere between me changing clothes and the rooms standing in the kitchen talking, we decided we were no longer going to church.
- When we were supposed to be at church we instead sat in our living room, windows open, watching twilight grow into darkness while we talked for a really long time.
- And skipping church to talk? Totally worth every minute.

*Apparently, this is turning into another list post... if you haven't picked up on that yet. My blog, my rules. Which really means I just make up things as I go.

On bike riding:

- Yesterday I went for a bike ride, four and a half miles out into the country where I sat on a bridge and read for an hour.

- Yesterday, after sitting on the bridge, I climbed back on my bike and somehow cut open my knee... deep. I then rode back into town with a thick trail of blood from my knee to my sneakers. Im not even sure what happened... I am that talented.

On Glee:

- Currently, Rachel on Glee is singing "Gives You Hell" by Pink.

- There is a guy, don't remember his name, who can really dance.

- I don't understand how Mr. Schu can wear jeans everyday as a teacher. I need to be a teacher in his school.

On random things:

- Grad school is back in full swing.

- Thursday nights are my new favorite nights I think.

- The weather has been getting into the 80's here but we don't believe in air conditioning. As a result, the rooms and I both sleep with our doors open which usually never happens.

- Someone should figure out my life for me and then leave me a map and maybe a compass.

Off to be pretend to do something productive.

Peace

In Which I Make a List

I am laying in my bed, in my artsy apartment, listening to my neighbors washing machine run and the sound of my roommate's fan from down the hall. I am decompressing and as such, feel the need to make a list. Or perhaps turning these thoughts into a list is the only way to make them make sense.

- I drove about 700 miles today. As that trip ended, I have now put over 2,000 miles on my car in less than two weeks

- If I were a superhero traffic and construction would definitely be on my list for a potential arch nemesis.

- I am in love with sunsets. And cameras. And the combination.

- Jo Jo, my GPS, gets a little zooly when we cross back into this state.

- Zooly isn't actually a word. I was trying to write wonky in a text earlier and T-9 translated it as zooly so I went with it. Maybe it will be my new word.

- The height difference between my bed here and my bed at my parents house is astounding.

- I wish pomegranates were in season.

- I am ready to get back out on the water with my pretty pretty wakeboard.

- Hit the worst rain I have ever experienced while driving today. I literally prayed for my life. My prayer was answered the way I desired.

- Driving for 13 hours with no cruise control sucks.

- Ever year I forget how freckles pop up on my face and arms when I start getting tan. I remembered now, after seeing them.

- Spring quarter for grad school starts on Monday. In some ways I am looking forward to having something productive to do with my time once again.

I need and want sleep.

Peace out.